ACT NOW
We interrupted your peace and solitude
so now take advantage of
HUGE SAVINGS
for
YOUR SOUL
conveniently brought right to your door
in the privacy of your own home!!!
You totally can't even yell at us, because we're smiley old people!
Don't be fooled by imitators
Do not sell your soul to the devil!
Commit to surrender - offer it voluntarily
to God
please see pamphlet
Certain restrictions may apply.
 |
| God's promise - Rainbows |
This offer is not valid if you are: Atheist, Agnostic, not Christian, Jewish, Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist, a stem cell, Animist, Ancestor Worshipper, Stone Mason, Asatrú, Bahá'i-ist, Brahma Kumarist, Rational, a Witch, Celtic Pagan, Confucianist, Divine Lightmissionist, Sciencer, Chinese, Druid, Druid's assistant, General Druider, General Druider's assistant, Dualist, Engaged in Research, Ebionite, Educated, Eckankarist, Subway sandwich artist, Catholic, Gnostic, French Nationalist, Gay, Hare Krishna, Jedi Knight, Mithraisist, a sitting princess, Native American, Occultist, Pagan, Pantheist, Bigwig OR Hazel, Raja Yogist, Rastafarian, Sodomizer, Santeríst, Satanist, Scientologist, Previous Contestant on America's Next Top Model, Shaman, Shinto, Gordon Ramsey, Taoist, Voodoo Master, Necromancer, Theologian, Homosexual, Vegetarian/Vegan, Pro-Choice, Reasonable, etc.
ACT NOW
Pre-Apocalypse Sale
Use offer code "four horsemen"
